5 watts.

there is not enough time to wallow, and we're already out of epsom salts.

before i go and grab another creemore, i'll say it: it's been a tough week.

as we saw from the last post, hydro has been more than brutal in its billings lately. then, monday, i get surplus status at my place of employment. follow this with some good news about other possible employment. follow this, promptly, with another case of lice (the FOURTH in a year) in the big little girl's lovely locks. follow this with an utterly disappointing lack of improvement in the individual time trial wattage test this morning. let's all sigh together now.

as we all know, i am the luckiest guy in the world and my life is not remotely hard. however, this all feels like it's been harder than usual and though i have managed to get some breaks in there (thank you GST rebate), the cumulative effects are still rather draining. i'm probably only typing write now to avoid the ever-increasing pile of dishes in the kitchen (dishes that made dinner 4 nights ago are still there.."soaking"...).

so i guess i should write today about positive reinforcement. and if that can't happen, because the results are less than positive, maybe i could write about the process. but then that makes it sound like the obsession of the mediocre, and not a valid pursuit for anyone capable of good results. (why would we sit around glorifying 'trying' if we could actually 'do'?) my legs are sore. my body is a bit drained. my kids aren't asleep yet. and there's laundry to do. glorious process.

either way, i think process is still pretty great, because it's the reality that may yield the result. it's the everyday. the mundane. the real life. the space in between notes that makes the music that much more beautiful. cuts in the tread of my tires. brake residue on my fork and rims. the familiar taste of hydration and recovery powder. the smell of sweat in leather. i'll take it. i'll run with it.